Venice Beach FS Slogans

With the understanding that my previous slogans read like paragraphs, I went back to the drawing board to create a few more.

- Odd Beyond Belief

- Odd, No Doubt

- Peculiar but COOL

- One of a kinds X 10

- Look Ma, Two Heads

- Wow, Two Heads Are ...

- Oooh, Look At That!

- Look at Dat, Look at Dat

- SEE It To Believe It!

- Look But Don't Touch !


So, I am looking for feedback from this list, what do you like.

Venice Beach Freak Show (Choose Your Message)

What will you expect?

We all have expectations of things, events and places.
Even though we may have plenty of  information available to us, often times we come up with a quick judgment  about something.

The Venice Beach Freak Show lends itself to just that.  It in itself is a presentation that is a contradiction.  One example of this is how the term "freak" is used to identify the term  "different".  The word "freak" has a negative connotation and typically many people will make their decision based on that word.

Walking down Venice Beach you will encounter a colorful giant mural.  There is a large two headed skeleton that is waving, that grabs your attention and almost seems to poke fun at it all. 

Also outside is a man (a "barker" or pitch man").  In listening to him, we are invited to come and see the first display (still outside and no charge).
 It is a 9"x16" plastic tub with water and a couple of rocks and two live turtles.  What makes it interesting is that the turtles have extra appendages and heads.  They are fully functional and do what turtles do while kept in In fact if you had never seen a turtle before, you would have accepted the notion that all turtles look like that.

Yes, a live dog with 5 legs

In talking with the owners, it seems that their real intent is to show the differences that go on around us and  to hopefully gain people's acceptance of the many miracles that occur in nature that we rarely see.

Inside there are many displays that give examples of  some genetically different life forms, along with some live performers that do their best to show you that things can be

very different than what we expect to be typical.

Bad Ad Gone Better Working Draft

The Fekkai ad is now being created from the final rough (from rough set #5).

 This working draft is a start from scratch.  While it would be easier to scan and past all the text (from the original ad), the process of learning would be lost.
So, at this stage we have some grid areas (on separate layers) that have blocks of text, the vertical logo and locations, a sample of product, and the "introduction line".
Aligning the text blocks will create a flow in itself, so looking at the shape of each block as well as its relationship to the other blocks is very important.

Image to go here... not uploading tonight

Bad Ad Gone Better (Sample of Rough Set #3)

This is a redesign of Fakkai's color care ad (samples from Rough Set #3)
The ad now features a larger model with a focus on just her hair (no dress).  The three text pieces working on a horizontal flow pattern with a play on words using the word "Behind" to tie in "The Man" and "The Salons".

Sample of Rough Set 3 

 

(Vertical logo)

Sample of Rough Set 3        (Horizontal logo)

                                                 The product is close to the model's hair and is in a higher position above the other two text areas.

The Original ad featured far too many cute slogans to make to make this version workable.  "The Man Behind" slogan was kept and incorporates the word "Behind" to tie in the Fekkai text and the Salon text.  Intro to Fekkai remains at top of page and is layered on top of model (showing importance).  Negative space allows reader to start at model's hair and into the intro/luxury text.  Following the hair line will take the reader to the text areas below.  Salon locations seem to work best in proximity of the logo.

Bad Ad Gone Better (Sample of Rough Set #2)

This is a redesign on the Fekkai Hair Care ad.
A picture of Fekkai has been positioned behind the model to tie in with one of his slogans "The MAN Behind the WOMEN".
The hair if the model (similar to web site model's hair flow) directs the visual flow of the viewer toward the text at the left.                                         
                                                      

Rough Set 2 (1of 6)

Class critique suggests that man's picture competes with woman's picture and that the text can be better arranged.

Roughs (set 3) should address these concerns.

Bad Ad Gone Better

 These are some of the FEKKAI ads redone.

The original ad highlights the model as if it were a dress ad.  It also hid the product into the lower left hand corner diminishing the effectiveness of the ad.

The new drafts clearly highlight the model and her hair.  She is no longer full length, but she now has function and purpose.
The model actually separates the informational text (of Fekkai and his Salons) from the product to be advertised.  Viewers can be with Fekkai or go straight to the product.

Draft 1

Draft 9

Draft 8

 The Fekkai logo (name in script) has been lowered vertically and the hand of the model points or touches it.  The bottom of her dress points to one of Fekkai's sayings.

The product is now on the right side of the model in a prominent part of the page (as we read from L to R/ Top to Bottom).

Negative space is in the upper right and text blocks can be adjusted to create more.
The new design now has better flow.

I like this ad!
It is clean and simple.  I has clean white erasers that point to the text, simple colors (beige, white, and black), different lighting on similar colored objects (for color contrast and depth), subtle shadows that also ad depth. 

The composition is nicely aid out with open corners, and the brand name at the lower right corner (the last place we read-in western style reading). 
High praise for the Large Readable Text! 
Kudos to the person that underlined the SPF info and has placed "100% Fragrance Free" in a clear uncluttered area. 

Later I'll have to go back and read the text, for right now I'm good with the visual and what it is "supposed" to represent.